While I am nowhere near the point in my career where staffing season directly affects me, I am applying to several fellowships, festivals, and the ilk at the moment. So in my procrastination way, I have put it off as long as possible. So by May, I need to have two specs, and due to rule changes, a pilot. Want to know what is stressful? Writing a pilot. I’ve never done it before – I’ve thought about it but always pick apart my ideas to the point of not wanting to ever go near them again. But here I go. Trudging along on a pilot I originally thought up a few years ago, that has gone from short film, to feature, to failed attempt at NaNoWriMo novel. So here I go turning it into a pilot. And holy shit is it stressful. My idols are bloody geniuses, so I always feel like a failure. Which granted, I am a baby writer so probably am. Scratch that, I’m not even a baby writer, I’m a fetus writer. Still forming into a fully fledged baby writer. Maybe in 9 months I’ll be a baby writer? Maybe 5 years. WHO KNOWS.
Along with the pilot, I have two specs. Both in the same-ish genre. One is more monster of the week, one is solid action with some in depth mythology. So which is easier? NONE OF THEM. THEY ARE ALL HARD. I commend every single writer out there, because this is such a thankless thing to do with one’s time. And so rarely does money come out of it. The whole bleeding process is like a sprinkle of chance on a pile of stress surrounded by a moat of fake promises.
So to sum it up, my life right now involves sitting at my computer, crossing ideas off of various drafts, slightly higher levels of alcohol consumption, occasional child’s pose randomly on the kitchen floor, and wanting to throw things. Hey kids, writing is a great career choice!